I’m sick of publications that glorify slimness and curves. Just-so breasts, tight asses and hourglass figures.

My partner, on our pre-vacation/honeymoon flight pulls out a freshly purchased ESPN magazine and flashes me a naked female body.

“Yeah, no,” I reply.

“But don’t you think the athletic issue is different?”

No. It’s not.

Yes, I’m having a personal reaction- a comparison trigger. I get that. I’ve just had enough partners make collage fo female body parts from pinterestthose comparisons for me that I’m apprehensive of a magazine filled with taut, traditionally “hot” female bodies following my fat self on vacation – one where I’m supposed to be having hot, newlywed, finally vacationing sex. I’m triggered. So, yes it’s personal and I’m withdrawing already to protect myself.

And, it’s personal because I’m pissed that he’s buying in to yet another publication, created by and for men, displaying women’s bodies as sex objects and reinforcing sexist, sizeist images. Women like me aren’t featured in magazines. That would be too radical- too unshapely. It’s “different” and “radical” enough that athletic women get to pose naked with hips cocked, glistening with a sheen of sweat- backlit and silhouetted sexy.

Its not different. It’s a continued commodification of women. A continued erasure of web like me. A continued reinforcement of the male eye.

And my partner has bought into it- literally bought it. And I’m as mad as hell, feeling crispy and isolated.


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